"Hello, I'm Gemma. You must be David. Lovely to meet you."An entirely true fact, but what if she thought I hadn't bothered to wash my hands? What if she thought I'm just a lazy, germ-laden animal? Will she have thought that I was actually doing her a courtesy, in not introducing the slightly soggy handshake to a burgeoning relationship, or that I was in fact just a very rude young man?
She sticks out a hand, which I decline to shake, with the words
"I won't shake your hand, I've just been to the toilet."
Have I, in fact, overthought this?
So many questions, so little time.